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Friday, December 23, 2016

hindsight

If you're a regular reader of my blog, you'll notice that much of this year has been based on self reflection. I've spent, in my opinion, too much of my time comparing my current life to the past. I know that throughout new situations and undergoing change this can be a common action, but I've been back in New York for over a year now. If I'm being honest with myself, I'm not sure if I have progressed in a positive way. It's nothing crazy, but I've recently found myself disappointed in my actions, and sometimes my lack of action. 

There's not excuse, anytime is a good time to recalibrate your ways and your lifestyle. Sometimes you need a good kick in the ass, a decent dose of rejection, a major mental slump, or disappointing somebody you care about to really push you in the right direction. Sometimes you need the sentiment of the holiday season. Sometimes you need it all at the same time. 

Here's to you, 2017. 









Friday, December 9, 2016

on love in twenty sixteen






The year of 2016 has built a bad reputation to many of us for many reasons. Typically when you're nearing the holiday season, you look back and reflect on the obstacles you've overcome and the changes you've made to progress as a person over the past year. As a single woman getting dangerously close to the daunting age of 30, dating has become more of a priority and less of a game. What I've learned about myself this year? I'm my own worst enemy. 

I can list off the men that had perfect boyfriend potential that I completely shut off over the past year because I'm so damn guarded: 

There's the selfless and generous lawyer who immediately introduced me to family and friends and said he thought I was the one. There's the creative and stunningly good looking hometown friend who just ran out of things to talk about after he said he was falling in love with me. There's the perfect person with the adorable accent who did say he loved me, but just happened to live on the other side of the world. There's the guy who delivered the perfect first date only to have a drug induced meltdown weeks later followed by a series of obnoxiously offensive text messages. There's the goofy, gorgeous, and intelligent guy who aggressively pursued me only to end up ghosting me. Then coming back. Thennn disappearing again. There's the charming bartender with the exact same taste in music but a completely different schedule and lifestyle as me.

I didn't mention the countless first and second dates over the past year I've been on with truly wonderful men, but I've been subconsciously ruling them out and truly never gave any of them a chance. That's when I realized - there are all these wonderful guys who are totally willing to go to the next level with me - the level I want, but there's always a but. 

So as I complain about wanting to settle down, about how picky I am because he's left handed or because he looks in the mirror too much, my biggest enemy is my own mind. As much as I want to settle down, I need to learn how to truly open up again, how to trust again, and eventually, how to love again. 

Here's to that happening in 2017.

Top & Pants: H&M
Sunglasses: Zara
Shoes: SEBAGO

Photos by Alyssa Timoteo

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

short and sweet

There are only 5 things you need to know about me this week:

1. My obsession with the song Private Idaho by the B52's is getting to the point of dangerously unhealthy. Plus side: I'm in an obscenely good mood because of this. 

2. There is such thing as taking too much Mucinex. It's cool, I'm alive.

3. The Law of Attraction, The Secret, all that stuff: IT WORKS. Big ups to my homegirl Rhonda Byrne because I get to see the Cavs play at MSG tomorrow night and I'm pretty sure I'm going to lose my shit before I even get to my seat.

4. I need a poké bowl. Now.

5. After the poké bowl, I need to pack my bags and go for a nice weekend getaway in that glass cabin upstate. In case you missed my post about this cabin, you can check it out on Airbnb here.   









Jacket: Twenty5A
Top: H&M
Jeans: Forever 21
Shoes: Vans

Photography by Alyssa Timoteo


Monday, November 28, 2016

the season of gratitude

As I arrive back in Brooklyn from a long holiday weekend back home in Ohio, I can't help but to think about a few things:  

1. I have the very best family in the world. I know that a lot of people think this about their own family, but there are also a lot of people who don't. I'm so grateful to be on the positive side of this. My mom is my very best friend - I'm her mini-me, a spitting image. She's also the best person in the world, so to feel like I'm walking in her footsteps is validation that I'm doing something right. I'm also picking up on some of my favorite things about my father - a goofy sense of humor (and the lack of a filter that can sometimes create an awkward moment), a strong opinion and hard head (we may disagree a great deal but I admire his passion and ability to stand by his word), and the need to take the most moral route to success. My sister and I had a rocky relationship through our adolescence, but maturity has proven to be the glue to our now flourishing friendship and I love her so much more everyday. Over the past year, she has defied all of the odds and all of the judgements I've carelessly and regretfully tossed her way. I couldn't be more proud of her. She's the best mother I've ever met. 

2. You don't have to get along with everybody. But as long as you're not adding fuel to the fire, as long as you're minding your own business, and as long as you're pushing to do the right thing, not getting along with one person is totally alright. I'm learning that my fuse is much shorter with people that I dislike, but biting my tongue has proven to be the best move when people are intentionally nudging at my weak spots. You can have the winning argument all figured out, you can have some amazingly damaging blackmail in your back pocket, but that doesn't mean waving it in your opposer's face is the right thing to do. Save your energy for the people you love, and as Michelle Obama says, When they go low, we go high. 

3. Friends always prove what kind of friend they are in a time of need. That phrase is typically partnered with a negative connotation, but this time is quite the opposite. Yesterday was a rocky day for me, and my friends displayed their loyalty without missing a beat. A dramatic situation found it's way to being a source of gratitude. This really is the season to be thankful! 

4. I did ZERO Black Friday shopping this year. None. It felt amazing.












Hat: AHK-MMXV
Jacket: Twenty5A
Sweater: Twenty5A
Jeans: Banjara Collection
Bag: Haystacks Brand
Shoes: Vans
Sunglasses: Zara


Photos by Alyssa Timoteo